Tag: post a week 2014

The Big 5 – “How” old do you feel? – Week 2

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anyone remember this decade?

Having been too old to enjoy Sesame Street when it first came out and not old enough to appreciate its finer comedic timing and pop culture references, Across the Bored was quite pleased when The Muppet Show made its debut in the late 1970s.  Sublimely ridiculous in its use of punmanship, with unabashed references to everyone from Shakespeare to the Village People, it was the one of the few shows that we watched faithfully. The combination of great silliness, snort-worthy parodies and even a few tear-inducing moments were exactly what we needed at that point in time.

We still do Swedish Chef impressions when trying to explain incomprehensible recipes, see the wisdom in Miss Piggy’s approach to life and yes, on some days know we have become Waldorf and Statler chiding and deriding from the best seats in the house. Watching reruns of this classic, truly unique in its genre, brings it all back and we laugh like pre-schoolers all over again.

This fortnight the Big 5 Challenge prodded – “How old do you feel?” –  like a kid in a candy shoppe or drudge with a mop, like you could run a mile, need to rest a while, could change your style or rule the world…

We would love to know how you are reeling in the years.

For all those who are new readers to Across the Bored, some great entries and the guidelines for this challenge can be found here: Need more info, want to browse past themes or get the badge for your blog? See HOW DOES THIS WORK.

Two Cents Tuesday Challenge: Heat – Week 2

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heat

modern day hunter-gatherers stalk elusive prey

When summer hits its stride in our neighbourhood the pervasive aroma outdoors around dinnertime is one of barbecue. Not your standard throw a couple of burgers on the grill type smoke wafting over the fence but the piquancy of Italian sausage, a simmering curry, jerk pork or roasting garden vegetables, for our street is a veritable United Nations of culinary diversity. We sometimes sit on the patio and sniff deeply, trying to divine what our neighbours will be feasting on by the tantalizing odours that snake across the back yards.     Our tastebuds anticipate much but truth be told when the temperature rises higher than our age Across the Bored is much happier when someone else cooks.

We do have a very valid ulterior motive: our reasoning is that our voluntary withdrawal from estival kitchen duty forces the Ghost and Miss Z to hone some very valuable and rewarding life skills. Their palates have been curated over the years, now is the time to see whether they have the chops to create their own mouth-watering masterpieces. Marinated or mulled, mixed, chopped, sautéed or saturated, in the oven, on the stovetop or flaming barbecue this fortnight’s Two Cents Tuesday Challenge theme would like to turn up the – Heat – and  get something wonderful cooking. Serve it and we will eat. If the weather has us all wilted, just put on some walking shoes and hunt down the nearest food truck…

Last week, Across the Bored asked “How do you see heat?” – The sun on your face, a favourite beach place, curry in a pot, flames fanning hot, a tight situation or artistic creation. We would love to see your vision..

For all those who are new readers to Across the Bored, some great entries and the guidelines for this fortnight’s challenge can be found here. Need more info or want to browse past themes? Have a look at HOW DOES THIS WORK.

The Big 5 – How old do you feel?

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how old

we can remember at least 30…

Pleasant weather has had Across the Bored seeking out old haunts and new neighbourhoods in some spontaneous outings these past few weeks. As much an opportunity to build up the photo library for some post-summer editing as they are  exercise in disguise, such sorties are also the perfect excuse for an ice-cold drink and a bit of people-watching from a shady terrace.  With time on our hands and no particular place to go, a few hours spent wandering around usually leaves us feeling invigorated.

Such was definitely not the case last Friday when my usual walking companion was otherwise occupied: itching to get out and get something done we headed off to a department store downtown with a focus on replacing some badly needed unmentionables. Now most men will just shake their heads and wonder how difficult could that be for it seems a simple matter of going to the underwear department, finding size and favourite brand, paying and going home (or just getting whoever puts them in the drawer to seek and replace) but certain ladies will more fully understand the torture that ranks on a par with the old pre-season swimsuit try-on debacles.

It’s not for lack of styles or sizes, stretch satin or spandex, balconette or push-up, may-I-help-yous or sorry, they don’t make those anymore. It’s not because of the awful lighting in the tired changing rooms with the fun-house mirrors that make one feel pastily like all the things we swore we’d never become. It may be that we don’t approach this kind of thing with the same zeal or excitement of youthful folly: it has come to the point where we want comfortable and reassuring, a little confidence-builder that doesn’t squeeze in the wrong place or cause unsightly bulges where they don’t belong. We don’t want to be reminded of the past, we want something for us now – if it comes in hot-pink lace then all the better. On our way out we met a lovely lady who looked just as bedraggled, put-upon and exasperated as we felt. “I hate doing this – it gets worse every year” she sighed as we flipped through the racks yet again for the one size we needed in the perfect style that was not there. She had been through the same ordeal: we were not alone, we are legion and as she pointed out, this type of battle deserved a rejuvenating reward – name your poison and swallow it with gusto!

The Big 5 Challenge puts forth that it definitely depends on the situation to make us 5 or 50. “How old do you feel?” – like a kid in a candy shoppe or drudge with a mop, like you could run a mile, need to rest a while, could change your style or rule the world…

We would love to know how you are reeling in the years.

For all those who are new readers to Across the Bored, here are some guidelines for the challenge: HOW DOES THIS WORK?

  1.  I will post some commentary such as the above on one of the five Ws (WHO, WHAT, WHERE, WHEN or WHY and sometimes HOW) and then ask you to respond on the same.
  2. Your point of view on the current week’s challenge can take any form: a reply in the comment box, in a new post with a quote, a motto or saying, an essay, poem or opinion of yours or attributed to someone else, a piece of music, a song, a video, a work of art, photograph, graffiti, drawing or scribble – but it has to be about the topic!
  3. Challenge yourself to dig deep for an answer.
  4. The Challenge will be open for 14 days (there will be a reminder post at the 7 day mark) after which I will post another.
  5. ENJOY, have FUN and TELL your friends and fellow bloggers.

SO – Create your Big 5 Challenge post

  1. Then add a link to your blog in my comment box.
  2. To make it easy for others to check out your post, title your blog post “The Big 5 Challenge” and add the same as a tag.
  3. If you would like your reader to see what others are presenting for the same challenge, add a link to the “Big 5” challenge on your own blog.
  4. Feel free to pick up your badge on The Big 5 Challenge page.
  5. Remember to Follow to get your weekly (hopefully) reminders.

Two Cents Tuesday Challenge: Heat

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heat

paled by bright sun

Sultry summer has definitely softened Across the Bored’s usually manic drive to be productive. After being housebound for the infamous longest winter ever there is nothing better than parking it in a chair outside, breathing air that isn’t cold enough to freeze lungs on impact and staring at the sky. Though not the spa, it certainly does one a world of good and serves to recharge those batteries drained by keeping our motor running during the icier months. 

Our routine has been hijacked by good weather and oddly, we don’t mind. Rather we are going to take as much advantage of it as possible because this bounteous gift of Nature may quickly be followed by forty days of rain. The Two Cents Tuesday Challenge has been made lazy by the – Heat – but it is the one time of year when things can arguably be put aside for more basic pleasures. “How do you see heat?” – The sun on your face, a favourite beach place, curry in a pot, flames fanning hot, a tight situation or artistic creation..

We would love to see your vision..

For all those who are new readers to Across the Bored, here are some guidelines for the challenge: HOW DOES THIS WORK?

  1.  I will post some commentary on a random topic that pops into my head (such as the above) and then ask you to respond on the same.
  2. Your point of view on the current week’s challenge can take any form: a quote, a motto or saying, an essay, poem or opinion of yours or attributed to someone else, a piece of music, a song, a video, a work of art, photograph, graffiti, drawing or scribble – but it has to be about the topic!
  3. Please, don’t just link to an old post… challenge yourself.
  4. The Challenge will be open for 14 days (there will be a reminder post at the 7 day mark) after which I will post another.
  5. ENJOY, have FUN and TELL your friends and fellow bloggers.

 SO – Create your Two Cents Tuesday Challenge post

  1. Then add a link to your blog in my comment box.
  2. To make it easy for others to check out your post, title your blog post “Two Cents Tuesday Challenge” and add the same as a tag.
  3. If you would like your reader to see what others are presenting for the same challenge, add a link to the “Two Cents Tuesday” challenge on your own blog.
  4. Feel free to pick up your badge on the Two Cents Tuesday Challenge page
  5. Remember to Follow My Blog to get your weekly (hopefully) reminders.

 

Fiction in 50: The Upper Hand

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upper hand

I can see them out there scampering around, laughing – yes, I can – furry beggars digging things up, making a mess of the marigolds and never taking the blame… I’d like to wring their little necks – one good shake and that would be it but She always has the upper hand…

The Bookshelf Gargoyle curates a Fiction in 50 mini-narrative challenge – this month’s prompt is The Upper Hand! Don’t let the summer heat get to you: pour a long, tall cold one and write a piece of short, short fiction: send it in and then go have a peek at the other entries – GargoyleBruce writes wonderful reviews on all sorts of kid lit (big and small) with a cheeky tone guaranteed to make you laugh out loud. Wander through the stacks, you are sure to find something you’ll like.

Click on the icon in the sidebar for previous entries…

The Big 5 – “When” was your last Duh moment? – Week 2

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duh note

we’re going to need the bulk pack of these

We couldn’t stifle a laugh booking eye appointments recently, although to be fair some confusion may have arisen from the fact that there is a quite complicated system in place as regards family names/gender for anything medical or governmental in our province.  The optometrist’s secretary chirpily asked “Ok Mrs. X, your file is under your maiden name, now could you give me your husband and son’s last name, please?” Pffft!!! She knew as soon as she had let it slipped – brain on autopilot, all part of the job….

Everyone from the Urban to Oxford dictionaries has an entry for the word we most closely associate with this kind of event. On Wiktionary certain Slavic language etymologies roughly translate it to mean a ghost or spirit, which makes some sense as it seems as though the perpetrator of the action is usually not functioning at full capacity.  In Shabo, it means “breast”, a definition which is perhaps the most accurate as we all feel like boobs when when we realize just how idiotic what we have just said or done is. Duh….

This fortnight the Big 5 Challenge pondered – “When was your last Duh moment?” – while reading a newspaper, watching TV, tripping over your own feet or someone else’s, silly or sad, complicated or bad, indescribably inane or just downright dense…

We would love to know when you last rolled your eyes to the heavens in exasperation.

For all those who are new readers to Across the Bored, some great entries and the guidelines for this challenge can be found here: Need more info, want to browse past themes or get the badge for your blog? See HOW DOES THIS WORK.

Two Cents Tuesday Challenge: Surprise – Week 2

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mouthguard required

One of Across the Bored’s blogger friends made a comment regarding this week’s theme that reminded us of Elmore Leonard’s novel-turned-film “Get Shorty” starring John Travolta, Gene Hackman and Danny DeVito among a raft of other Hollywood A-listers. A crime-comedy-thriller about gangsters and decoys, death and deception, cons and canards, the story carries both its own characters and the viewer along on a joy ride that has more twists and turns than a 5 star amusement-park roller coaster.

The critical acclaim it received comes partly from the leads’ stellar performances but more importantly from the exposition of well-crafted personalities and how they manifest when thrown into sometimes wildly explosive circumstances. Every cinematic opportunity is taken to play off the unexpected against basic human nature and the plot capitalizes on this to unravel and unfold the drama to the next level. The lead-up to poor mob boss Momo’s birthday extravaganza highlights the notion that we default to that which we are accustomed to, that way of living and reacting that becomes the pattern for our existence going forward.

Life has a warped sense of humour that seems to say “let’s see what happens if…” at every turn. Like even the most well-intentioned family and acquaintances, it takes pleasure in fooling us. As our friend wryly pointed out, there is no doubt that some social situations, especially the ones that are thrust upon us, the ones for which we are totally unprepared for or seem to come out of left field, that leave us not only shocked but mortified. This fortnight’s Two Cents Tuesday Challenge theme – Surprise – knows that when it comes to the crunch, really, anything can happen. Hold on to your hat….

Last week, Across the Bored pondered  – “How does surprise look to you?” – Awkward or elated, with a bang or for the bin, elegant or understated, sweet and delicious, with a side of sin…  We would love to see your vision.

For all those who are new readers to Across the Bored, some great entries and the guidelines for this fortnight’s challenge can be found here. Need more info or want to browse past themes? Have a look at HOW DOES THIS WORK.

Two Cents Tuesday Challenge: Surprise

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surprise

almost uprooted:
good thing we believe in the procrastination method of weeding…

Across the Bored can’t remember which year it was that Miss Z insisted daisies would be the perfect potted plant swaying in the breeze beside our door but we do distinctly remember pulling out the dried brown husks of their summer daintiness once upon a frosty day in late October and pitching them into the front flower bed. They had been surprisingly high maintenance despite their hardiness, much like Miss Z, requiring much hydration, daily rotation, some artful pruning and a watchful eye to make sure they didn’t go off in all directions.

We can’t say they were spectacular nor did they deliver as many blooms as we had hoped to make little rustic bouquets from and that was pretty much the end of that. Until this very late spring when we espied some new previously unidentified growth next to the rather large seeding dandelion plant and the oriental lilies pushing their way through the soil. Our first thought was to pull it all out by the roots but then we got distracted by something more pressing and walked off. A week later the Two Cents Tuesday Challenge was hauling the recycling bin out to the curb when – Surprise – the weeds had bloomed overnight into quite the pretty little floral display… 

“How does surprise look to you?” – Awkward or elated, with a bang or for the bin, elegant or understated, sweet and delicious, with a side of sin…  We would love to see your vision.

For all those who are new readers to Across the Bored, here are some guidelines for the challenge: HOW DOES THIS WORK?

  1.  I will post some commentary on a random topic that pops into my head (such as the above) and then ask you to respond on the same.
  2. Your point of view on the current week’s challenge can take any form: a quote, a motto or saying, an essay, poem or opinion of yours or attributed to someone else, a piece of music, a song, a video, a work of art, photograph, graffiti, drawing or scribble – but it has to be about the topic!
  3. Please, don’t just link to an old post… challenge yourself.
  4. The Challenge will be open for 14 days (there will be a reminder post at the 7 day mark) after which I will post another.
  5. ENJOY, have FUN and TELL your friends and fellow bloggers.

 SO – Create your Two Cents Tuesday Challenge post

  1. Then add a link to your blog in my comment box.
  2. To make it easy for others to check out your post, title your blog post “Two Cents Tuesday Challenge” and add the same as a tag.
  3. If you would like your reader to see what others are presenting for the same challenge, add a link to the “Two Cents Tuesday” challenge on your own blog.
  4. Feel free to pick up your badge on the Two Cents Tuesday Challenge page
  5. Remember to Follow My Blog to get your weekly (hopefully) reminders.

 

The Big 5 – “Where” do you relax? – Week 2

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charles-barsotti-relax-it-s-summertime-and-the-living-is-easy-new-yorker-cartoon

so much so that auto-schedule is also taking a break

Perhaps the old joke about this part of the continent having 10 months of winter and 2 months of lousy skating has more than a little to do with the fact that once this season comes we are all just a wee bit off kilter and though full of ideas about how best to take advantage of everything outdoorsy, we are at the same time stricken with that full-body paralysis that makes us just want to lie on something soft in the brightest patch of sun around.

Urban summer is a whole different season from blissful by-the-ocean or camping in the meadow endeavours and was proven by an unavoidable Sunday morning trek into the core of town only because we could not live one moment longer without power for the internet router. Of course, tech support sent us to the wrong outlet. The one with the not-so-happy to be working on the last day of a glorious weekend sales associate who was no help at all and who will not be winning any customer service/employee of the month awards; the one which opened a full two hours before the one that actually did carry the part we needed… Now our day of rest is usually spent in relative solitude, far from the madding crowds with perhaps a nice waffle and a cappuccino on the patio and the most aggravating it gets is lazy dog clamouring to visit his friend next door. So needless to say, we were not amused.

It did give us a chance to walk around for a bit and play tourist with those out for Grand Prix weekend but mostly it served to remind us that downtown is best enjoyed when everyone is working. What was supposed to be a quick trip turned into a five hour trek and resulted in one pitiful AC plug and the need to put our feet up for a bit when we finally did make it home. Could be worse, we could have paid a small fortune to broil with no earplugs in the stands at the racetrack. This fortnight the Big 5 Challenge asked – “Where do you relax?” – under a cozy duvet or at the beach, on skis or a motorcycle, in the garden or in the middle of the city, behind the wheel or in front of the pack…

We would love to know where you are the most at ease.

For all those who are new readers to Across the Bored, some great entries and the guidelines for this challenge can be found here: Need more info, want to browse past themes or get the badge for your blog? See HOW DOES THIS WORK.

Two Cents Tuesday Challenge: Silly – Week 2

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silly old duck! where we learned to rhyme…

Once upon a time, we would sit ourselves down at 5:55 every Sunday evening in anticipation of that magical moment when the Disney theme song would come crackling out of the television set. The hour’s entertainment was always a surprise for there was no TV Guide to tell us what to expect – not every show was a thriller but those nights that were more than made up for the “educational” instalments. Our favourites, like most little kids, were the cartoons and it didn’t really matter who took centre stage for they each had a repertoire guaranteed to generate a few laughs.

Ludwig Von Drake was the odd bird in the Disney Duck family: it might have been that he was a little high-brow, had an odd accent or just wasn’t slap-stick enough for most but our pre-school mind-in-formation saw that here was a fowl who knew his way around science, classic literature and music and had evidently seen a thing or two of the world and come back to tell everyone about it.  As much as we craved to be the miniature tornadoes of trouble that were Huey, Dewey and Louie, the Professor who knew something about everything was more our type of role-model. Besides, he had a warped sense of humour and was a whiz at constructing a bad pun…

This fortnight the Two Cents Tuesday Challenge recommends that we all remember what it is like to be – Silly – lie in the grass and look at the clouds, go kick a can, eat an ice cream cone with sloppy abandon like a five-year old but let yourself do something frivolous for a change.

“What is silly?” – A cartoon character or politician’s gaff, a two year old’s antics, a joke or a laugh, a funky fad or fashion craze, an old-timer’s tale or those newfangled ways…  We would love to see your vision.

For all those who are new readers to Across the Bored, some great entries and the guidelines for this fortnight’s challenge can be found here. Need more info or want to browse past themes? Have a look at HOW DOES THIS WORK.